Burn, Baby, Burn

Posted by Ryan Jerz on Tuesday June 15, 2004.

I am writing this as the fourth quarter starts in Game 5 of the Lakers-Pistons series. The Pistons, unless they have a Trailblazerian meltdown, will win, and finish off the Lakers. But even more interesting than the upset are the comments made by Jimmy Kimmel regarding the impending destruction of the city of Detroit following this game. Yes, Jimmy was right. See, when a city hears someone mention that it is going to burn itself down, and it gets all offended, that usually means it actually is going to burn itself down. Just watch. I look forward to tomorrow morning when I log on to find out that there are still fires blazing throughout Detroit. And lets us not be disappointed here. I expect a multitude of overturned cars as well.

If you happen to think this is a bit unfair, show me why. They riot in Detroit when the hockey team wins, and nobody even cares about hockey. Detroit doesn’t exactly have the greatest of reputations. Heck, even nice calm places like Los Angeles, Denver, and Oakland get themselves into trouble after their team either wins or loses a title. It happens everywhere, and when your place is crime-ridden and downright scary, it’s probably going to happen there too.

One good thing can actually come out of this. Detroit can act like a grown-up and not self-destruct. That would be good. And if it does happen, they should thank Jimmy Kimmel for it. Because if he hadn’t said they would implode, nobody would have actually thought about their reputation, and they would have imploded. But Jimmy did as much for Detroit as those people who walk around campus at night chanting anti-rape slogans do for rape prevention. They all raise awareness.

*UPDATE*
Looks like the fans in Detroit decided to stick with fireworks instead of the molotov Cocktails. So I was wrong. But one quote by the police chief was a little bit telling. She said that is was pretty much normal. I guess Detroit normally has crowds chanting “Ain’t no party like a Detroit partty, because a Detroit party don’t stop” all the time, eh?

Ryan JerzRyan Jerz is an all-around good guy who wants people to eventually refer to him as "that dude who climbs mountains."

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