How to know you've hit the big time

Posted by Ryan Jerz on Friday November 17, 2006.

I never thought my comments in the News and Review would lead to so much attention. But, alas, the attention is on me, and I should at least acknowledge it.

First, there was the article itself, in which I have very long quotes and basically dominated the conversation. I had no idea that a majority of what I said would be put into it, but as I read it, I liked it. I still do.

Next, Myrna wrote a nice long piece that fired up all the characters she normally gets. My question is whether any of them would have read that much into what I said without her framing of the issue. Doubtful. I’d bet that they would have just found me boring and moved on. Kudos to Larry and Reno Rambler for getting that part right. Their prize might be that quote them on my soon to be released banner. That’s why I called it “rallying the troops” in an earlier post.

Next, I got a lot of comments filled with anger and name-calling directed at me. Now, I’ve had people call me names before, like when Susan Nunes called me an idiot for actually having the audacity to say Dean Heller and Jim Gibbons would win their respective elections. Yeah, what a moron I was. Anyway, where was she for this whole brouhaha?

Then, Helen entered the scene. Not only did Helen leave a lengthy comment, but she then reprinted that comment on her own site so that her readers, who are located EVERYWHERE could see it. She proceeded to mention me in that post, another post, then dedicated a song to me, and followed that up by writing me a letter. Topping all of it, though, was that fact that she and The Jerz Gobbler began tonguing each other in the commets sections of their respective sites. “Get a room” is so cliché, so I say to them, “Get a video camera!” Actually, shouldn’t the Jerz Gobbler be a bit jealous. She did dedicate a song to me. I didn’t touch her, though, Jerz Gobbler, so don’t think you can start a fight with me.

Speaking of the Jerz Gobbler, did you read his letter in the News and Review this week? Considering he was an absolute failure in his quest to take down Ty Cobb through abject lies, you had to know he would move on to a new subject. Well, that seems to be me. I’m honored. If honor could come from anything the bastard does. Those emails he talks about are pretty funny. My “severe profanity” includes calling his act “bullshit” telling him to “f-off” – twice – and actually spelling it out, and also invoking the Fark cliché Die in a Fire. So again, we’re faced with the non-existent Jerz Gobbler acting like some sort of victim of tirades when the joke is on him. What a dipstick. To call this moron my nemesis is an insult to my abilities. Not that people are above insulting me, or that I have many abilities. We learned that from our friend Larry the marketing whiz. I haven’t even gotten to the Jerz Gobbler’s post about the story, in which he, of course, lauds his mention in a paper he’d never admit to being a fan of. They are liberal, you know. But they do have that little policy of printing anonymous letters in a time that the media desperately needs more transparency in every aspect. Oops, did I state an opinion someone may not agree with? And what do I know about the media, anyway?

Jerz Gobbler followed that post with one about the flap. Sticking a foot in the mouth implies someone should be or is ashamed of something. On the contrary. I stand behind my interview in its entirety and the quotes Peter Thompson used. Hell, it would appear I made the damn story, and started all the subsequent discussion, as well. Props to me. The Jerz Gobbler might want to be careful how he treats his new chick, though. By saying she isn’t truthful enough for me he implies that she is a liar. Maybe Helen needs to get out now, before he gets more abusive. It’s tough, I know. You love him, but he says mean things, but you don’t want to let go. He has a hold of you, and it’ll be hard to break that hold, but you can do it, Helen. You have to want to do it, though.

If this attention has taught me anything, it’s that I can handle it. People have said things about me that they would say about politicians. When you thrust yourself into the spotlight, you’d better expect people to resist that. Well, not only did I resist it, I’m thriving on it. Keep it coming, people. I wouldn’t be the same without you.

Ryan JerzRyan Jerz is an all-around good guy who wants people to eventually refer to him as "that dude who climbs mountains."

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