I like Dick Cheney. I like him for one reason alone. He told some self-important Senator to go fuck himself. And I think that’s admirable. In fact, I think I’m going to incorporate “Go fuck yourself” into my normal interactions with people on the internet. And how funny is that? I now actually have seperate types of interactions – personal and internet. Well, from what I can tell, my latest internet interactions are worthy of people fucking themselves. So there. I think I’ll start a new section of the site called “People who should fuck themselves, preferably away from me.” The problem with that is that most of them are such pansies they don’t use their names. So it would just be this long string of “anonymous” and they person wouldn’t know they were supposed to be fucking themself at that moment, not in my presence. Or, maybe it could be interpreted that if you are a person who uses anonymity to “protect yourself” or whatever garbage you’re spewing as the reason, fucking yourself should just be par for the course. However you want to read it is up to you. Exemptions from the Fucking One’s Self Clauseâ„¢ would include, but not be limited to, sports sites (because anonymity allows for information that would not be public to spread among interested parties, such as front office insight and the like). Expressly included in the Clause would be politcal sites, simply because politicians are assholes and they use their naive, brainwashed lackeys, who also happen to be assholes, to spread around bullshit either about themselves or about their opponents, and it completely ruins the discourse on a site. Go ahead and include self-proclaimed politcal operatives in there, too.
Thank you, and have a great day, or go fuck yourself, whichever applies to you.
Comments
mrjerz wrote:
Sure thing, Kevin. I’ve actually been meaning to tell you that for a long time. Which one, you ask? I’m not saying.
Jun 16, 06:02 PM
myrnatheminx wrote:
Dude! The so called “self important” senator, Patrick Leahy, was sticking up for the people when Cheney insulted him. Probably pointing out to Cheney that there is a third branch of the government despite what th vp thinks. I wish Cheney would crawl into a deep dark hole somewhere. He’s done more damage than possibly anyone in history to American legacy of balanced government. He’s the self important one—actually, that’s the nicest thing I could ever call him.
Jun 20, 10:46 PM
mrjerz wrote:
Myrna,
Turn the tequila off. I know you’ve been in Mexico, but seriously. First off, senators, by their very nature, are self-important. They are the “higher” level of the Legislative Branch, and therefore think of themselves as above others. Just look at them. So despite their motives, they are, in fact, self-important dickweeds.
That brings me to my next point. If Leahy actually thought he was educating Cheney by telling him there are three branches of government, none of which actually include “the people,” then not only did he deserve what Cheney replied with, he deserved it in a fist sandwich. Seriously. If Leahy actually, for a second, thought that Cheney was that stupid, I not only applaud Cheney for the response, I wish everyone would have taken heed and begun responding similarly.
One thing we don’t lack in political discourse is hyperbole. Stop acting like your political opposite is “EVIL!!!” Start acting like your polical opponent is someone you want to see defeated. Take the right steps to do it, but refrain from telling me the guy is a bastard when I might actually agree with his policies. That might just make me think you’re dumb, and as an honest person, I don’t want to think that. I want to know why you dislike him. Not just THAT you dislike him. If you can reason with me properly, I might just change my tune. But I’ll be honest with you. Some things carry more weight than others. Being a person actually capable of telling a senator to go fuck himself is worthy of my admiration. Attempting to explain to a twice-elected vice president that “the people” actually have a voice is Cheney Clause worthy. It’s my bias, I’m laying it out there for you.
So refrain from the “Cheney is the worst person in history, EVAR!!” rhetoric, and look at it like I do, then come talk to me.
Jun 21, 03:53 AM
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Ryan Jerz is an all-around good guy who shoots photos and video, builds websites, and works in athletics at the University of Nevada, Reno. He received a Masters Degree in 2007 from the University of Nevada, Reno's Reynolds School of Journalism.